cost of a guilty conscience

The other day on my way to work. The first mat i took to work was to Roysambu, i am expected to pay 20ksh, but the mat conductor forgot to ask for my fare, you know so many times before things like this av always happened  and when i don’t pay my dues I find that I lose something very critical and more so costly and the devil has a wicked way of nagging it on your conscious you swear to never do that. I t has so happened that when I think about such incidences, i am obliged to pay my fare.
But once I discovered a secret, wicked human thoughts!!! it so happens that once I realised that when I would skip fare, I would just to turn to God and say,

 “O dear lord, How Your eyes look upon me with disdain and myself am embarassed of my filthy mistake, But O lord forgive me, I will never do it again, please dont make me lose something for mere change”

And btw God is too kind, I found out i would forget my sin so quick and nothing costly would get lost.
So this particular day, I didnt give the konda the fare and I didnt even care to pray for forgiveness, I don’t want God to regard my prayers as cover-ups or as child’s play so I knew well punishment would come, but not in the way it came.

So after I alight at Roysambu, I take another mat to Thika, and I take a comfortable seat at the back, trying to bask in the glorious sunrise, and some other fella sat on my side. I did ignore him much the tym, just an ordinary joe!!Until of course when we were handing in our fares, he had a 500 ksh note, u know at that point u r tempted to tryna make some small talk but I assumed the urge and got on with listening to the blaring music.

so as the konda was returning the change, the konda gave the guy 500 shillings in change and he didnt realise his mistake but I did. the man did too and with trembling fingers he folded the notes into his pocket as fast as he had gotten them and with an upright guilty posture, he looked like he was holding in a fart. lol

so I looked at the guy and almost leaned onto his ears to whisper a condemnation of how what he did was not good, just then a deja vu occured, and I remembered the parable of Jesus; of pointing out a speck in your brothers eyes while you have a log in your own. And I remember it saying,”Do not judge,so that you won’t be judged”- some justification!!!
So like quiet waters in a pot, i held my horses  and restrained myself.

that guy may have not been a christian, at least a practicing one, as he didn’t return extra change given to him, but at least his actions showed that a voice inside condemned him, which was gratifying at least, because as he alighted he walked on without looking back, left or right, although he was crossing the road, and he hurried away, so at least his sins wouldn’t be discovered early or ever. A guilty limp.
i was left there with my mouth gaping and thinking to myself, I obviously couldnt have said it while I myself was guilty. Thank God our sins are not written all over us.

that same evening, back at home at a local kiosk, the shopkeeper gave a buyer more change, I didnt condemn the buyer but I told the shopkeeper that.
Ever since av been thinkn of this same escapade…. what a way to punish a dishonest servant!!!!Make them think so long about their mistake!

Have a Honest day, won’t you?

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